it's been one HeLLuvA year...
If i was told years ago that my life would be the way it is now... i would've laughed in that person's face, brushed that comment aside, and have forgotten about it and thought nothing of it in an instant. I'm sure of it. I never thought this is what 2004 would've been like for me... never. But i'm not complaining... nothing but good has come from it and i'm happier than i have ever been my whole life...
What can i say? It's difinitely been one of a kind.
*January 16, 2004... i found out i was having a baby boy.
*May 4, 2004... Dylan came into my life and i experienced love and happiness like never before.
*December 26, 2004... Dylan got a front tooth for Christmas... haha! (total cornball here, but thinking it to myself, it seemed really funny at the time!)
I remember when i was younger, the thought of being a mother and giving birth would scare the living shit out of me. Horror stories from parents and giving birth scenes from movies didn't help either. I once told myself that i would turn into a nun, just so i wouldn't have to go through it. (haha! frickin' weirdo! not that there's anything wrong with being a nun... )
I look at how far i've come and i really can't believe i'm actually doing this... being a mom is amazing and having that little someone love and adore you is priceless!!! =) I can't even begin to explain how it feels. Having Dylan and being his mom has made me feel complete.
This was my year of starting out as a mom so there's really nothing else for me to talk about. I devoted all my time and energy to Dylan. I'm glad i did too... because he's growing up so fast i can hardly keep up. There are things that need to be written down onto his baby book that i keep on forgetting to do. We have to start baby proofing the house and start thinking that there's a possibility that he could seriously hurt himself (this morning, it was all my fault, Dylan started choking on a piece of celophane... if that's even how it's spelled. To my horror, it wasn't even reachable anymore!!! It was a good thing that babies have a really good gagging reflex... Dylan managed to vomit it out. He's never playing with wrapper like that ever again. Or so i said, because later that morning, he swallowed a piece of cardboard, thanks to Aix! *ahem*) Okay, swaying off topic here...
I feel like he's not a baby anymore... He's standing, and crawling, and starting to think like a real person (you know what i mean). He has facial expressions for every emotion, his face is starting to look different coz his teeth are coming out, he has a head full of curly hair, and he's drinking 8 ounces of milk!!! My baby is turning into a kid... like a toddler kid who does stuff and gets hurt and smells. I miss the baby... i'm totally kidding! I'm loving watching Dylan turn into a toddler. It's sooooo exciting... it's just that i feel like i don't have a baby anymore even though i know he's gonna be my baby forever. haha! Okay, sounding like a conrball mother here...
2005--- Dylan is turning 1 this year. We have a lot to look forward to. =)
I started working when i was 17. I made 500 bucks a night and i thought i was rich! haha! Over worked and underpaid, i didn't give a shit coz i was having crazy fun. =) I haven't gotten an allowance from my parents in 5 years. I've even been supporting my family with everything that i've been doing... so not having a job is really hard for me. This past year was the first time in so long that i had to be dependent on someone else for my funds... and it sucked... hardcore. I can't stand it. So now, i'm starting work again, and it's cool. =) Something different, but i'm gonna try it out and it pays anyway... so why the hell not, right?
Working was what got me through the last 5 years of my life. Because of it, i met my bestest friends, i travelled all over the Philippines (FOR FREE!!! which makes the travelling even better!), I helped out my family, and the opportunities that i got and everything i went through was simply spectacular. Overwhelming and breath taking. My life has been amazing and i really cannot complain. Well, i shouldn't anyway... hehe!
I have never been in a serious relationship prior to the one i'm in right now. Before this, the longest relationship i ever had was 10 solid months... and that was high school. haha! I've never really been one to commit for so long... i was so the independent type that tying me down with someone would be the equivalent of strangling me underwater. Mars and i have been together for over 2 years... and before this, it was a month by month kinda thing. And i never really broke up with any of my exes... we always had to end our relationship because they had to leave for somewhere not in the Philippines (and why i'm even writing about this, i don't know).
Anyway, being in a relationship simply just for the two-some, just a couple, just him/her and you is completely different from being in a relationship as parents. When there's that little someone involved, roles evolve and the relationship changes. Well, that's what i think. For me, the love was put aside to raise our child... more than ever, we needed to work as a team, and we really really really needed to work as partners. I'm not gonna sit here and tell the world that i'm in the fairy tale relationship where my prince saves the day, sweeps me off my feet, and we live happily-ever-after. Nope. It has been hard. This has been the best realtionship of my life, and at the same time, the hardest motherf***ing thing i've ever had to endure. It's been quite difficult, just to be honest. And how we've managed to work it out and get this far together, still surprises even me. It must really be the love, if anything else.
My family has always been my rock. Always. But that didn't really prove itself or mean anything as much as it has this past year. The constant support, love, and encouragement they have never failed to give me made this past year easier than what it would've been like without them. I will forever be thankful for the family i've been put in. I love em! =) And the little addition to our family has made everything even better.
So the past year i've been living under a rock. I can count the number of times i've been out with one hand... and the times i've been out that has really been eventful... just one. The nightlife in Manila is pathetic... far from what it used to be. Sad. Maybe everybody just grew out of it. The people are different, the vibe is different... the only thing that's the same is the frickin' music. haha! i'm kidding. No, it's changed quite a bit, but it's still nothing great. They're trying to bring old school back, so that's cool. But if they play that shit all the time, everywhere, no doubt people will start getting sick of it too. This place needs variety!! In everything! Clothing, Identitites, Music, People!! (i'm going off topic again...)
Anyway, i might start going back out again... just so i can get a life! No, but i do need an occassional baby break. I need to communicate with people my age too! And i can't go out just to work out or just work. I need a break too. And that doesn't make me an evil parent. Knowing that Dylan is in good hands make it even better for me too. I can actually sit back and relax! =)
But don't get me wrong... i know my limit. I have responsibilities so i'm not gonna go nuts like how it used to be... i know that! *psh* Please bring dancing back! Nobody dances anymore! People should really start doing that again... so i can go out and get a work out at the same time! haha! Seriously though... that's how i used to keep the weight off. Something i desperately need to do now...
Whatever. I've just been blabbing... I can't think straight.
In a nutshell: It's been a great year. I'm just hoping the next year will bring more good fortune and a shitload of happiness. =)
If i think of anything worth writing, i'll just add it on...
Have a KiCkAss NeW YeAr!!! *wOoP wOop*
What can i say? It's difinitely been one of a kind.
*January 16, 2004... i found out i was having a baby boy.
*May 4, 2004... Dylan came into my life and i experienced love and happiness like never before.
*December 26, 2004... Dylan got a front tooth for Christmas... haha! (total cornball here, but thinking it to myself, it seemed really funny at the time!)
I remember when i was younger, the thought of being a mother and giving birth would scare the living shit out of me. Horror stories from parents and giving birth scenes from movies didn't help either. I once told myself that i would turn into a nun, just so i wouldn't have to go through it. (haha! frickin' weirdo! not that there's anything wrong with being a nun... )
I look at how far i've come and i really can't believe i'm actually doing this... being a mom is amazing and having that little someone love and adore you is priceless!!! =) I can't even begin to explain how it feels. Having Dylan and being his mom has made me feel complete.
This was my year of starting out as a mom so there's really nothing else for me to talk about. I devoted all my time and energy to Dylan. I'm glad i did too... because he's growing up so fast i can hardly keep up. There are things that need to be written down onto his baby book that i keep on forgetting to do. We have to start baby proofing the house and start thinking that there's a possibility that he could seriously hurt himself (this morning, it was all my fault, Dylan started choking on a piece of celophane... if that's even how it's spelled. To my horror, it wasn't even reachable anymore!!! It was a good thing that babies have a really good gagging reflex... Dylan managed to vomit it out. He's never playing with wrapper like that ever again. Or so i said, because later that morning, he swallowed a piece of cardboard, thanks to Aix! *ahem*) Okay, swaying off topic here...
I feel like he's not a baby anymore... He's standing, and crawling, and starting to think like a real person (you know what i mean). He has facial expressions for every emotion, his face is starting to look different coz his teeth are coming out, he has a head full of curly hair, and he's drinking 8 ounces of milk!!! My baby is turning into a kid... like a toddler kid who does stuff and gets hurt and smells. I miss the baby... i'm totally kidding! I'm loving watching Dylan turn into a toddler. It's sooooo exciting... it's just that i feel like i don't have a baby anymore even though i know he's gonna be my baby forever. haha! Okay, sounding like a conrball mother here...
2005--- Dylan is turning 1 this year. We have a lot to look forward to. =)
I started working when i was 17. I made 500 bucks a night and i thought i was rich! haha! Over worked and underpaid, i didn't give a shit coz i was having crazy fun. =) I haven't gotten an allowance from my parents in 5 years. I've even been supporting my family with everything that i've been doing... so not having a job is really hard for me. This past year was the first time in so long that i had to be dependent on someone else for my funds... and it sucked... hardcore. I can't stand it. So now, i'm starting work again, and it's cool. =) Something different, but i'm gonna try it out and it pays anyway... so why the hell not, right?
Working was what got me through the last 5 years of my life. Because of it, i met my bestest friends, i travelled all over the Philippines (FOR FREE!!! which makes the travelling even better!), I helped out my family, and the opportunities that i got and everything i went through was simply spectacular. Overwhelming and breath taking. My life has been amazing and i really cannot complain. Well, i shouldn't anyway... hehe!
I have never been in a serious relationship prior to the one i'm in right now. Before this, the longest relationship i ever had was 10 solid months... and that was high school. haha! I've never really been one to commit for so long... i was so the independent type that tying me down with someone would be the equivalent of strangling me underwater. Mars and i have been together for over 2 years... and before this, it was a month by month kinda thing. And i never really broke up with any of my exes... we always had to end our relationship because they had to leave for somewhere not in the Philippines (and why i'm even writing about this, i don't know).
Anyway, being in a relationship simply just for the two-some, just a couple, just him/her and you is completely different from being in a relationship as parents. When there's that little someone involved, roles evolve and the relationship changes. Well, that's what i think. For me, the love was put aside to raise our child... more than ever, we needed to work as a team, and we really really really needed to work as partners. I'm not gonna sit here and tell the world that i'm in the fairy tale relationship where my prince saves the day, sweeps me off my feet, and we live happily-ever-after. Nope. It has been hard. This has been the best realtionship of my life, and at the same time, the hardest motherf***ing thing i've ever had to endure. It's been quite difficult, just to be honest. And how we've managed to work it out and get this far together, still surprises even me. It must really be the love, if anything else.
My family has always been my rock. Always. But that didn't really prove itself or mean anything as much as it has this past year. The constant support, love, and encouragement they have never failed to give me made this past year easier than what it would've been like without them. I will forever be thankful for the family i've been put in. I love em! =) And the little addition to our family has made everything even better.
So the past year i've been living under a rock. I can count the number of times i've been out with one hand... and the times i've been out that has really been eventful... just one. The nightlife in Manila is pathetic... far from what it used to be. Sad. Maybe everybody just grew out of it. The people are different, the vibe is different... the only thing that's the same is the frickin' music. haha! i'm kidding. No, it's changed quite a bit, but it's still nothing great. They're trying to bring old school back, so that's cool. But if they play that shit all the time, everywhere, no doubt people will start getting sick of it too. This place needs variety!! In everything! Clothing, Identitites, Music, People!! (i'm going off topic again...)
Anyway, i might start going back out again... just so i can get a life! No, but i do need an occassional baby break. I need to communicate with people my age too! And i can't go out just to work out or just work. I need a break too. And that doesn't make me an evil parent. Knowing that Dylan is in good hands make it even better for me too. I can actually sit back and relax! =)
But don't get me wrong... i know my limit. I have responsibilities so i'm not gonna go nuts like how it used to be... i know that! *psh* Please bring dancing back! Nobody dances anymore! People should really start doing that again... so i can go out and get a work out at the same time! haha! Seriously though... that's how i used to keep the weight off. Something i desperately need to do now...
Whatever. I've just been blabbing... I can't think straight.
In a nutshell: It's been a great year. I'm just hoping the next year will bring more good fortune and a shitload of happiness. =)
If i think of anything worth writing, i'll just add it on...
Have a KiCkAss NeW YeAr!!! *wOoP wOop*
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